Defining Your Reality?

Have you ever assessed your life and experiences and asked yourself, “What is my reality?”

In life, some individuals embrace their truths and realities and are living up to their full potential. On the contrary, others continue to stand in the shadows of others, thus helping others define and live their realities instead of trying to cultivate their own. Standing in the dooms and glooms of others results in you granting those persons permission to cast a dark cloud over your ability to define and transition into your authentic self. Being positioned behind others could diminish your character and cause others to see you as untrustworthy and unworthy of respect. Furthermore, falling in the shadows of others may deem you incapable of being a leader, holding critical positions, or being at the forefront, even in your own life. These self-coverings will cause you to lose the fortitude needed to live out your reality. It can also result in your realities to be less augmented. 

Authentic realities first start with self-authentication. Your reality results from being true to who you are, knowing your worth, and what and who you stand for, no matter what that entails. Reality means not trying to live up to the potential of others. Living up to your reality means not succumbing to past and current situations and circumstances. It also means not falsely and fictitiously demonstrating who you wished you were to others. More importantly, reality means having an accurate perception and standing in your truth and not trying to rewrite your past, share misinformation, or diminish the character of others because yours is severely fractured. To determine and define your reality, you must take accountability, particularly as your realities will be demonstrated through your actions, behaviors, and social engagements. 

Most persons in this world will demonstrate false and fabricated realities. These false realities result from never forming their own reality or positive self-authentication. False realities mean individuals are lost or stuck or have conformed to what society suggests they should be or not be. They have become self-removed. They’ve given others power over them for so long that they lack guidance and direction to take ownership over their own lives. Psychologically, when others are not able to define or live their reality, it is because they have perpetually suppressed their inner and childhood demons, guilt, and regrets, along with espousing other pessimistic-laden feelings and thoughts. Cognitive repressions can leave people clueless about how to face their demons and get over their past, thus resulting in the inability of them ever being able to step into their reality. They will live the rest of their lives comfortably situated behind others. 

Actual reality is knowing that no two persons are alike, and everyone has been granted an innate ability to define their “personal” reality. Even “reality TV” involves a staged or false depiction of what reality means. If you ever want or need to step into your reality, you must be first mindful and consciously aware of yourself and your past and current experiences and circumstances. Secondly, you must circumscribe your reality. Thirdly, you must be self-authentic and true to yourself without needing to prove yourself to others. You are the only person that matters. Fourth, no matter how complex, you must channel your inner demons and relinquish their powers over you. Otherwise, you will forever be stuck in the past, repetitively ruminating on negativity, engaging in self-inept and self-doubt, and lacking the needed psychological strengths, motivation, grit, and perseverance to progress and thrive in life, move forward, or maintain healthy connections. Fifth, you must acknowledge that your authentic or erroneous realities are demonstrated behaviorally, socially, and cognitively and cascade into various life paradigms for others or the world to see, allowing them to form their own perceptions of how real you are. 

When asking yourself, “What is my reality?”

Form your own reality and be true to who you are, changing for no one and nothing. Let no one define or try to change who you are. Doing this denies others access or the ability to generate misperceptions or spread misinformation about who you are or who they cast you out to be. It is paramount that you unapologetically create and live in your reality. Create your authentic reality before inviting others in who can contribute to what that reality entails. 

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